REVIEW: Doom Patrol #1

Writer: Gerard Way
Artist: Nick Derington
Review: Will Dubbeld

I've had my ups and downs with Doom Patrol. I adore the concept of a team composed of just screwed-up superfolks, riddled with dysfunction, and still trying to maintain a status quo and fight the good fight. The roster has always been engaging, filled with robots, giant-girls, shapeshifters and other misfits of science, and I'm always willing to give 'em a read.

Unfortunately for Doom Patrol (and myself) the book always seemed to fall just short of my expectations. Early stories aside, most of the contemporary Doom Patrol stories I've read seemed a bit pretentious and were weird just for weirdness' sake.

And yes, I'm mostly talking about Grant Morrison's run.
Lauded by most, found tiresome by me.



However, as I'm always willing to take a crack at a new take on a book, I stepped up for another serving of Doom Patrol. Scribed this time by Gerard Way (who is the frontman for some emo band, if memory serves) who has been praised for his Umbrella Academy book, the new Doom Patrol left me wanting.

I was a bit apprehensive to begin with, not being a fan of Way's musical work, but I figured I'd let his comic work speak for itself.
Apparently it hasn't much to say.
Aside from a pretty good introduction of Robot Man, the Doom Patrol is in absentia with the exception of a (very) brief appearance from Niles Caulder. The majority of the book deals with a new character, ambulance driver Casey Brinke. She and her partner Samson appear to be the 'man on the street' vehicle through which the reader can experience the world of Doom Patrol.
I, for one, particularly hate this storytelling vehicle in comics.  I'm reading a fantastical story about superpowered heroes and villains. I don't need an Everyman as connective tissue.

The real dealbreaker for me came in the form of a board meeting where a mix of cubist and lumpy aliens (demons? Find out next issue!) discuss SINISTER PLANS involving an 'all-new mentally healthy meat menu', franchises, and sentient organic generator sprawl. I gathered they were part of some evil fast food conglomerate, but the scene utterly lost me with pseudoscience buzzwords and gobbledygook about 'goobfoobers' and 'moofgoobers' and other proto-Seussian bullshit.
Zero interest as presented.

Edging that scene out for most 'wtf?' moment is one presenting a domino-masked showgirl who shows up at Casey's apartment and blows up her roommate in a shower of balloons, confetti, and cake frosting.
And she's totally cool with it.
Our Everyman doesn't bat an eye, really, even when the offending showgirl promptly asks to move in.

Weird for the sake of weird, ladies and gentlemen.

There's no consistent flow to this book, no linear storytelling to speak of, and certainly nothing to make me recommend Doom Patrol.
It's like Gerard Way read every early Vertigo book and thought he should one-up that level of discordant oddity and deconstruction.

Unfortunately, Alan Moore, Neil Gaiman, and Grant Morrison are MUCH more proficient and I doubt the halls of history will echo with the stories of Gerard Way's Doom Patrol the way they will about Animal Man, Swamp Thing, and Sandman.

In all fairness to Mr. Way, I WILL buy a few more issues of Doom Patrol in the hopes a coherent story will appear. I'd hate to have unfairly judged his comic book without seeing the full scope of the story. I'll stick around for the arc, unless it proves to be a dumpster fire so great I cannot stand the stinky, stinky flames.
Perhaps Doom Patrol is a mastercrafted yarn with entertwining plot threads and hair-raising exploits.

I'd've maybe put some of that in the first issue, though...

Weird for the sake of weird.

Postscript: I did get a chuckle out of DC's gimmick cover, however. A peelaway sticker of a gyro (the Greek foodstuff, not the mechanical bit) conceals a clever picture that is relevant to the deeper theme of issue 1.
(I think...)

Caveat emptor.